Strangely, the Judge Couldn’t Be Found Inside the Mailbox at the UPS Store: According to the February 12, 2009 Atlanta Constitution (here), Fulton County deputies have yet to serve suit papers filed on December 12, 2008 against a Fulton County Superior Court Judge, even though the deputies and the Judge all work in the same courthouse building and even though the summons was addressed to the Judge at the courthouse. However, the deputies did attempt to serve the Judge at his campaign headquarters mailbox at a UPS store.  (Map courtesy of Fulton County deputies.)

 

Hell: According to a February 10, 2009 Minneapolis Star Tribune article (here), local police in Texas have seized 22 urine-soaked dogs found with their owner inside a locked station wagon. The ammonia level inside the car was measured as 23 parts per million. Humans reportedly start experiencing health issues at 12 parts per million. The article does not explain the simultaneous combination of owner, dogs, urine and locked station wagon.

 

Her Whole World Came to an End in an Instant: You might say, she broke a nail, big deal, right? However, Lee Redmond of Salt Lake City has not cut her nails since 1979. The total length of her nails in 2008 was over 28 feet, including a right thumbnail that measured nearly 3 feet long. She has appeared in the Guiness Book of World Records. The Associated Press reports (here) that she broke her nails after she was thrown from an SUV in a vehicle collision. She was hospitalized for serious injuries that are not considered life threatening – unless of course your life consists of being famous for having long fingernails. Everyone here at The D&O Diary hopes for the best for Ms. Redmond.

 

I Wonder, Did They Check Bernie Madoff’s Shoes?: According to a February 11, 2009 San Jose Mercury News article (here), a mortgage fraud suspect stopped at the Canadian border had $70,000 stuffed in his boots. (Don’t ask, of course they were cowboy boots.) He also had $1 million in Swiss bank certificates and four ounces of platinum valued at $1,420 an ounce. What an idiot. With the global economy in the tank, he probably could have written off the value of the certificates and gotten a tax loss carry forward for the next five years, and with commodities prices what they are, he was probably carrying the platinum at a loss too.

 

A Strange World, Indeed, Mr. Mum:  Ordinarily, I find material for my blog posts basically by roaming around the Internet and after a while someting worth writing about just kind of shows up. For whatever reason, last night, all I could find was a bunch of really weird stories. After a while, it occured to me, when life hands you lemons, or whatever, you basically just have to make a blog post out of it.

 

The hardest part was figuring out how to categorize this post. Categorization is a mandatory publication prerequisite within the blog software I use. I finally decided to put this post in the "SOX (Generally)"  category, because, after all, what is more absurd than the word "SOX"? 

 

All of this reminds me of the old comic strip, written by Irving Phillips, entitled "The Strange World of Mr. Mum." As shown in these examples, Mr. Mum was a silent but observant witness to all of the world’s absurdities. Many of the strips ended with Mr. Mum in a bar, contemplatively drinking a glass of carrot juice. (I just hope his dogs weren’t locked in the car outside.)